Ok so i've done some research into this that should help other owners in the future.
The VW factory kit (cradle in the armrest, full bluetooth throw the multi function computer etc) that is found in Touaregs is manufactured by Nokia. In typical Nokia fashion (I spent 14 years in telecoms!), they have made the kit support one of their proptocols calls rSAP or remote Sim Access Protocol. This allows for the contact data to be uploaded to the car etc.
In order to get full functionality, you need to choose a phone that is rSAP compatible. That means most Nokias of course and several basic Motorola, Siemens and Sony Handsets.
For those that use a smartphone of any type, some BlacbkBerry handsets support rSAP but they're not very reliable with it and the best option would be an E series Nokia (E63,71,72 etc). Beware as even some Nokias will require rSAP to be activated using the phone's bluetooth connectivity menus.
If you have an Iphone or an Android device, there is no way these will work. I found loads of beta chat on the web about this but so far no one seems to have designed any way to resolve this.
There are 10 cradles available for 10 of the oldest phones known to man, these can be easily found on VW UK's website in the accessories section.
If you have another VAG group car that has the changeable cradle system mounted on the car dash somewhere, you have more options available. There are a number of cradles, including Iphone available but the nicest device is a clip on/off bluetooth functionality screen that allows connection by any bluetooth phone, smartphones included. It's an aftermarket product, i think made by THBury for VW and seems to be available readily in Germany. You can find more by searching for VW Germany Handy Accessories on the web. (They call a mobile a handy over there!).
Also good to know is that the cradles are made by Paragon Fidelity in Germany and they have a much greater choice there than here. There is no reason that I can find why you can't order one from there from any VW dealer, it should work here with no issue. The German VW site has lists of cradle details and part numbers etc.
The upshot of all this - I have to change phone to an E series Nokia in order to use my new car's bluetooth. Not the end of the world as all i wanted was to make sure i could still get work email thru an Exchange server.
It's made by THBury and is excellent.Not marked as such so not sure, am sure someone out there knows that !
Comes from VW accessories catalogue but could be made by them.
All I know is that it works very well !!
Had a real good search and no-one has yet cracked the Android issue with any cute solutions. There is some talk of the latest Android 2 version coming with rSAP as standard but they also took ages to support some parts of Exchange support so we'll see how it develops. I do hope they get there as although i quite like the E72, Android rocks!As well as the nokias, some bb will fully connect. I have used a storm and 2 bold, curves, etc. I currently use a htc windows mobile touch pro, the touch diamond, and touch pro 2 also work. I am surprised the Androids dont. Maybe have a skulk around the geeky Android forums, and see if someone has made an "app".